#6

There is this girl that that totally mystifies me, and at the same time, terrifies me. She has these eyes that look straight through you, as if her gaze is piercing through your soul, and this devious little grin that sucks your will from your body.

Her name is Selena, and don't think you can resist this munchkin's charm.

I took my seat, and Katie was so focused on the kid that she didn't notice me. I imagine Jenny had existed to her only as an arm that was holding Selena.

We tossed small talk, then Jenny asked a dangerous question.

"Could you hold her for a few minutes while Katie and I go to the restroom?" she said. "We both really have to go."

Katie's brow furrowed with confusion, then her eyes focused on me as she acknowledged my presence for the first time and became intense pits of jealousy. She was terrible at holding babies. No matter how gentle she held them, even if she had a necklace of pacifiers, baby bottles, and teddy bears on her neck, small children hated physical contact with her.

I, however, got along with kids, Selena included, fairly well; plus, I needed a few minutes to think before Katie had a chance to interrogate me about anything Bat had said regarding her recently.

"Sure, I'll hold on to the little doll for ya," I replied, and assumed the position. You know the one, you lean in, extend your arms, and be ready to dive for the catch in case the little bugger manages to wiggle loose while being transferred. No one likes to see baby brains on the floor, after all.

Jenny and Katie got up, stretched, and took off for the hallway that led to the restrooms. They alternated at looking back every few steps, each one saying with her eyes that if that child was not in better condition than how they left her, they would both relish in tearing me to pieces upon their return.

I got the message, and cupped one arm behind Selena's back and head. She looked at me, grinned, and started manipulating her mouth as though she were chew a piece of licorice.

"Ahh... Ahhhll... Ahhhlk," she paused and looked at me for recognition.

"Alex?" I replied. Her smile broadened. Mine felt like it reached back, below, and behind my ears. Selena knew "mama" and "dada," and now she was trying my name. I could've cried.

"Very good, there, that was very, very good," I said, hoping she'd do it again so I'd know I wasn't imagining it.

"Alleechhh.. aaall...aaaaccccccchhhooo!" She sneezed in my eyes. A baby sneeze, where the head mostly stays still because they still aren't that flexible and the sneeze just seems to pop out of them. You know, it's like a wave starts at their fingers and toes and pushes all the way to their face, their eyes close, and WOOOOOOOOSH!!!!

My eyes stung bad enough to make me think I'd dipped my face in acid. Who knows what Jenny'd been feeding her?

I took one arm and rubbed it in my face, and once I had my vision back I focused them on her again. Selena was proud of herself, she was giggling at me. She knew how cute she was, and that made her dangerous.

"Umm, excuse me sir?" said the sorority sister at the next table, (you can always spot them by the whites of their Greek-lettered T-Shirts). "My friend here wanted to know if that's your daughter."

Her friend, likewise in Greek garb, wrinkled her face in anger for being the scapegoat of her friend's curiosity. Either that, or she was embarrassed from being outed as a person who was interested in me. It's like the scarlet letter, I tell yah.

"No, this little angel belongs to my friend," I answered. "She needed to take a break so I'm caring for her for the time being."

A tiny light popped on in the back of sorority girl #2's head, reflected off her inner ear, filtered through her cerebrum, and refracted through her left eye. She liked that answer. I liked her eyes. She let a little smile shine through the middle of her mouth. I curled the corners of my lips up, nodded and remembering my duties I returned my attention to Selena.

WOOOOOOOOSH!!!! went Salina's sneeze. I had forgotten the other characteristic of baby sneezes, that they come in groups, and I would pay dearly.

I gasped for breath, my mouth wide open so not to suck in baby drool. Big mistake.

WOOOOOOOOSH!!!! WOOOOOOOOSH!!!! she went again. I wasn't holding a baby, I had a geyser in my arms.

Sorority chicks 1 and 2 were clutching to their chairs as they nearly laughed themselves to the floor when I finally wiped my eyes out enough to see. The kept on for a few minutes.

I thought my chances were through when #2 got up, still snickering, wrote something down on a piece of paper, and walked my way.

"Here," she said as she laid it on the table, the seven digits beaming with triumph. "My phone number, you earned it."

I barely managed to mumble a "hello" and "my name's Alex" before she turned to go. She snorted while walking back to her table, and she and her friend both grabbed their sides and book bags and giggled on their way out.

I looked back at Selena, my eyes ready to slam shut at any instance. She had a grin on her face that seemed rather sly, and then she winked her left eye at me.

"Did she just wink at you?" demanded the Katie from behind me, who apparently had gained the ability to appear out of thin air whilst between dance practice and trying to get her political science degree. I should note that judging from the tone of her voice, she was so full of envy the entire nation of Ireland was completely put to shame by the shades of green her skin took on.

"Um, I think so," I answered, suddenly afraid that I might have broken the child.

"She never winks at me," Katie moaned.

"She never winks at me, either," said Jenny, her voice eminating from Katie's left.

I had two women, both likely under the influence of hormones, jealous of me. My life expectancy was dropping faster and faster as I looked to Selena for help.

Her eyes read "Hey, you're on your own now."